我不难过

又站在你家的门口 我们重复沉默
这样子单方面的守候 还能多久
终于你开口向我诉说她有多温柔
虽然你还握着我的手 但我已不在你心中

我真的懂 你不是喜新厌旧
是我没有 陪在你身边 当你寂寞时候
别再看着我 说着你爱过 别太伤痛
我不难过 这不算什么
只是为什么眼泪会流 我也不懂

就让我走 让我开始享受自由
回忆很多 你的影子也会充满我生活
我并不懦弱 你比谁都懂 虽然寂寞
这会是我 最后的宽容

抱紧我 再抱紧我 这一份感动 请你让我留在胸口
别在说是你的错 爱到了尽头 是非对错 就让它随风
忘了所有 过得比你快活

我真的懂 你不是喜新厌旧
是我没有 陪在你身边 当你寂寞时候
别再看着我 说着你爱过 别太伤痛
我不难过 这不算什么
只是为什么眼泪会流 我也不懂

不要再说 或许这是最好结果
现在分手 总好过你不爱我一拖再拖
松开你的手 离开你左右 我向前走
这会是我 真正的解脱

you were loved at
11:38 pm

The Exit

An interesting week this has been. Many things of magnitudes have happened, leaving me in a partially confused state. Well, sometimes ppl ask me not to think too much. That's true, but thinking does gets u a little less confused, but at the same time more confused over wat u've not addressed. Sigh.

Grls play soccer more violently than guys do.

Service learning today was quite fruitless. Despite the constant efforts of the school to promote "community service", there are actually dozens of classes combing the beaches for litter. While it wasn't really my class fault that we had to do beach cleaning, simply because we didn't choose it, still it wasn't very fulfilling knowing a few hours of cip has been gained just because we took a stroll by the beach. And all the effort to plan those activities for the kids, well sadly it didn't come true. Kinda pity.

Hmmm so our school's chosen for the JC to try out the 5-day week. Sigh. This thing has totally no good pts about it. Encourage family time, how true. All the talk about no official activities on weekends, but which student can really turn down an unofficial invitation for make-up classes for the sake of family bonding? And now that CCAs can't be on Saturdays, oh well that leaves even less time. Solution is to take 5minutes off every period from 8.30am onwards, that wld truly be able to solve the problem. CCAs can really be split up into 4 different days like 1 hour each day right? So students in the end go home vvv late on weekdays and with the remaining time at home to do homework, revision, read notes blah blah, they still have a hell lot of time to talk to their parents. Disastrous.

you were loved at
6:29 pm

Knock Some Sense Into Me

Timely intervention. Else I would have drowned. Well, guess things just happens sometimes. Sleep well tonight. And tomorrow will be a better day. Smile more. Laughter makes you forget alot, alot. Smiles.

Jazz is interesting. A different kind mood sets in. Drowsy. Sensual. Kinda like it.

you were loved at
12:17 am

Illogical.

Filling up on the past few days...

Friday. Been long since we all played soccer together liao. With trainings now no more a part of our lives, soccer sessions have decreased simultaneously. Well, add our fitness to that. Like I always say, 5mins is all I have. After that I'll be panting like some bull. Of course, the sharpness has also left. Oh well...

The same day. Got the greatest cramp of my life. Guess this also shows how the endurance of our bodies have disappeared. A couple of hours on the court and our muscles can't even take it. Facing the prospect of the upcoming US vs track match, I wonder how we can take some 11 season-just-ended and fitness-on-the-peak trackers.

Saturday. Weather was fine. Or rather fine in this context means that it was alright for sleeping, for lazing around, for not doing anything kinda day. And that's what exactly I did. Woke up with half the day gone. Did nothing for the rest of the day. Could be nocturnal since I enjoy the dark skies and quiet surroundings so much. How contradicting. My day started at night. At this time, 25th Jul, 1 month - 1 day b4 prelims, notes should well be my best friends.

Sunday. Day haven finish. Nothing to update. But I'm still waiting.

you were loved at
3:15 pm

1/24

1.30 & I'm at home. School still haven end for most ppl. Well so that takes me back to dropping Chemistry. Seems like it wasn't the solution to my poor grades, for my grades fell even more in bt2. Well I just have to buck up. August 24 first paper, that's like 1mth/30+days/4+weeks. Oh my! That's like so short and all I've done is my everyday work. Who wouldn't wish time would turn back? But right now what I can is put in the effort I lagged the previous months. In Maths lect Ivan was just telling me that it's crazy going to watch movie later. Prelims is so near. Go home study. Struck something in me. Should I go later?

In a while time I'll be going to tp polyclinic to have a checkup. A follow-up to the NS checkup but it'll be kinda important cause it'll determine whether I'll be like the majority of 18-yrs-olds and be doing all the physical stuff. Well I certainly hope I'll be.

Do not wait; the time will never be 'just right'. Start where you stand, and work with whatever tools you may have at your command, and better tools will be found as you go along. - Napoleon Hill

you were loved at
1:30 pm

Intuition Triumphs Over Logic

Soccer today with 7 ppl. Oh well our 'system' thingy is getting from bad to worse. Soccer has altogether become different. I can't explain it, but it just feels different now...

Super tired after playing till like 6+. Went home & experienced a most excruciating cramp ever suffered. Ooh, and it still hurting now. Racial harmony day tomorrow, but well what kind of mood is there to rejoice or probably remember the day? Staring at my phone. Was kinda expecting a message but i guess it'll never come. Lol maybe i'm already forgotten. I guess ba.

Posted something yesterday but i guess it just didn't turn out well. Because my com has been experiencing some directing thingy that directs ur IE page to a particular website. This dumb thingy has been continuing all along & disturbs the user. Didn't manage to post it yesterday due to that also

Anyway, failed econs. Lowest in class. =(

you were loved at
10:54 pm

The Trouble With Love Is

Oooh oooh, ooooh yeah, mmmm...

Love can be a many splendid thing
Can't deny the joy it brings
A dozen roses, diamond rings
Dreams for sale and fairy tales
It'll make you hear a symphony
And you just want the world to see
But like a drug that makes you blind,
It'll fool ya every time

The trouble with love is
It can tear you up inside
Make your heart believe a lie
It's stronger than your pride
The trouble with love is
It doesn't care how fast you fall
And you can't refuse the call
See, you got no say at all

Now I was once a fool, it's true
I played the game by all the rules
But now my world's a deeper blue
I'm sadder, but I'm wiser too
I swore I'd never love again
I swore my heart would never mend
Said love wasn't worth the pain
But then I hear it call my name

(The trouble with) The trouble with love is
It can tear you up inside
Make your heart believe a lie
It's stronger than your pride
The trouble with love is
It doesn't care how fast you fall
And you can't refuse the call
See, you got no say at all

Every time I turn around
I think I've got it all figured out
My heart keeps callin' and I keep on fallin'
Over and over again
The sad story always ends the same
Me standin' in the pourin' rain
It seems no matter what I do
It tears my heart in two

(The trouble with love is) The trouble with love, yeah
(It can tear you up inside) It can tear you up inside
(Make your heart believe a lie) Make your heart believe a lie
It's stronger than your pride

(The trouble with love is)
It's in your heart
It's in your soul (doesn't care how fast you fall)
You won't get no control
(and you can't refuse the call)
See, you got no say at all

(The trouble with love is) Oh, yeah
(It can tear you up inside)
(Make your heart believe a lie)

you were loved at
7:49 pm

Dilemma...

Sigh.. Don't even have the courage to do something i desire..

you were loved at
7:11 pm

8th World Wonder

Woke up early this morning, made my coffee like I always do.
Then it hit me from nowhere, everything I feel about me and you.
The way you kiss me crazy, baby you're so amazing.

Seven days and seven nights of thunder,
The waters rising and I'm slipping under.
I think I fell in love with the 8th world wonder.

I guess that I'm just falling deeper into something I've never known.
But the way that I'm feeling, makes me realize that it can't be wrong.
You're love's like a summer rain, washing my doubts away.

Seven days and seven nights of thunder,
The waters rising and I'm slipping under.
I think I fell in love with the 8th world wonder.

It's only been a week, but it's coming over me.
It's making me believe that you're the one for me.

Seven days and seven nights of thunder,
The waters rising and I'm slipping under.
I think I fell in love with the 8th world wonder.

you were loved at
12:30 pm

Sink... Or Swim

As i ride in the bus on the long journey home today, i'd a strange feeling, as if a flashback.. The streets of jurong resembled that of some other street, a street i had trotted along almost every other day then.. So much that it was nearly real.. Well, that was some time ago.. The times that were probably the best i ever had, second only to my enriching JC life.. Memories of the various things we've done, the places we been to, the conversations, nothing could beat that.. Yet good things never last, and indeed they don't.. Before i could offer some form of retaliation, i found those happiness become a film without sound, without touch but full of emotions.. Now that i've moved on, i found myself translated into this dimension where voices, especially laughter were remembered but no longer be heard, things could no longer be touched, but felt.. Occasionally i would long for that feeling again, but even the dumbest in me would know it wouldn't be possible.. Only the memories to revive, the scenes to replay..

At the present facing an imminent prospect.. Feels as if the feeling is reignited.. A certain sense of well-ness and plenty of good feelings around, though i'm not inn any sense confident of them right now.. I'll take things as they come.. Ultimately the decision to light the candle will depends on none other than myself.. Of course whether the match allows me to strike it is another issue altogether.. But right now i'll bid my time and get to know myself better first.. I wouldn't want to burn myself or spoil the match..

you were loved at
10:23 pm

3 - 4

What a pathetic score. Despite playing our hearts out as most would have, the scoreline still reveals a painful truth - we lost. Well, for all the training & trial sessions we had, and all the sharpening of skills on the courts, our team just wasn't enough to overhaul the council lead. Disappointment. We didn't underestimate our opponents, the fact is that we weren't good enough, & results never lie.

What's heartening is at half-time the score being 1 - 3 disfavour of us, we still came back & put in an outstanding performance in the 2nd half. Miles of improvement made to our game today, tactically & experience wise, our team definately benefitted from this match. Most would say if we had actually gave in a 2nd half performance for the entire match, we would most probably emerge as winners. But "ball is round" theory tells that nothing in soccer is for sure.

Undeniably, disappointment. The build-up to the game was immense. The way we viewed this game. Its importance. We had placed so much emphasis on this game. It was simply disheartening for us to lose. Hard work pays for nothing in the end?

Personal highlights of the match.
A through-ball from CJ sends Ivan thru with only mootz to beat. Mootz & a fellow defender challenges for the ball with Ivan & with a nod Ivan puts it past mootz into the back of the net. GOAL!
A free-kick just outside the penalty box. I decided to haf a try & sent in a cross to the far corner. Both defenders & strikers fail to make any contact with the ball & the ball flew just wide of the post. MISS!
Another free-kick outside the penalty area. I decided to have a chance at goal since the box was crowded by the defenders. Fortunately for us, mootz's punch at the ball wasn't enough to stop it hovering into the back of the net. Fluke goal. GOAL!
The score was sealed at 2 - 4 disfavour of us. But on kick off the ball was laid to Biao who then fired a long distance pass-shot towards the goal. Ivan & me chases for the ball and mootz gets to it first, but spills it. The ball falls perfectly for CJ but much is left undone. A beautiful volley by CJ puts the ball into the net beyond the reach of the defending team. GOAL!
Towards the dying minutes of the match with the scoreline at 3 - 4, CJ passes to me who then run towards the box, avoiding two defenders. With the goal mouth at my mercy, my weaker left foot is unable to get around the ball & thus sent the ball wide of the top corner. Leonard & Ivan stood waiting unmarked around in the box, staring in disbelief. MISS!

From this match, the results tells it all. A closely battled game with occasionally clashes between certain outspoken members of the teams. But otherwise a game played with true sportsmanship. No doubt a defeat left our hopes & expectations shattered, the experience & many other things learnt will be greatly remembered. Awaits the next clash with council, it'll be a more exciting match.

History has demonstrated that the most notable winners usually encountered heartbreaking obstacles before they triumphed. They won because they refused to become discouraged by their defeats.

- B. C. Forbes

you were loved at
9:22 pm

You Don't Miss Your Water - Craig David

As I sail with you across the finest oceans
On a way to find the key to our emotions
Together we will move the clouds to brighter days
Some people question what I say
Tried to break up you and me
But I know this love between us is growing stronger
You can call me whenever from wherever
Just remember that
I'll be there
Through all the stormy weather
Us break up never
No we'll be together
Forever

You don't miss your water 'til the well runs dry
But I believe so strongly in you and I
Can somebody answer me the question why
You don't miss your water til the well runs dry

As I close my eyes
Sit back while reminiscing
Of when we used to fuss and fight but end up kissing
There may be sad and pain for time so long to wait
But in my heart you'll always be everything and more to me
For I know this love between us is growing stronger
You can call me whenever from wherever
Just remember that
I'll be there
Through all the stormy weather
Us break up never
No we'll be together
Forever

For you are always on my mind
You are always on my mind
Girl you know that you
You are always
You are always on my mind
You are always forever

You don't miss your water girl no
But I believe so strongly in you and I yeah
Can somebody answer me the question why
Cause you don't miss your water 'til the well runs dry yeah listen
If you ever get the feeling
You wanna play around starting cheating, remember
You don't miss your water 'til the well runs dry

you were loved at
10:17 am

Bo0...

Holland is gone...!

you were loved at
9:41 am

WooHoo!

Yipee...it's over! Finally, what a relief. But while i'm typing this i know this is just a small small thing compared to what's the real one. Yet given my natural optimism i'll just enjoy my time now & cast everything behind for a short time. B4 we all know it this happens to be the last semestal in school. Can't believe this educational life of mine is coming to an end. What's ahead i know not of, but couldn't say i'm really looking forward.

So many things have happened recently. Not just block test but the all important council vs us match is just this Saturday. As i was telling ivan soccer would never be the same after this. An evenly matched match as most were saying, but i beg to differ. I'm well aware of our own potential and also proud of our team spirit. Everyone's playing for everyone else. How often do you actually play your heart out for your friends? I'm honoured...

you were loved at
12:49 am